I’m sitting with a group of professionals. Wow, they have been through tough times the past few years. As you know, I work with professionals who support children and families – healthcare providers, educators, mental health experts, home visitors, and the like. They hear so many stories of hurt, stress, and family chaos. And they often feel so helpless. Helpless to change, to offer solutions, or to provide guidance around next steps. 

But you don’t have to solve any problems to be helpful. Please understand this!

Acknowledgement Matters. Recognizing a person’s pain matters. Sitting with hurt matters. Hear me out on this: you don’t have to solve problems to help. Sitting in discomfort with someone else is offering of yourself and a tremendous support! When you allow someone to be fully human – angry, distressed, confused, anxious, or sad, you’re providing a holding space for emotional pain. Research tells us that sitting with someone else’s pain, acknowledging that what they’re going through is valid, and being present for them is healing. 

So, if you’re like me and you want solutions or an offering or problem solving, stop. Instead, offer an ear. A hug. A word of validation and support. You, your presence, is enough. I’ve worked with thousands of people of all ages and you know what they always want more of? Listening. It’s truly that straightforward. 

Listen with your whole body. 
Validate.
Empathize. 
Ask if the person wants feedback or not. 
Limit interruptions.
Honor their story. 
Protect their privacy. 
Check in later. 
Thank them for trusting you.

Let me know how this resonates with all of you. I hope you’re enjoying the last, beautiful days of summer!

And if you’re looking for inspiring words, training, or keynotes for 2025, we’re booking dates, so reach out here!