My son called me with excitement last week, “Mom, I crushed my sales call for FFA!”
He celebrates with me.
My daughter called me in tears, “Mom, I’m so sad, can you talk?”
She mourns with me.
My son, “Mom, can you help my friend with a resume? A job? A meal?”
He trusts my experience.
My daughter, “Mom, can you talk to my best friend about sex and boys?”
She trusts my tenderness and wisdom.
For those of you who may not be as familiar with me, I have two children, ages 16 & 18. But, it wasn’t so long ago when they were tiny. When they were little, it felt like their needs were constant. As toddlers, and young children, they were constantly needing, begging, bidding, and seeking my attention in every moment. I can easily reflect back to moments of strife, balancing work and motherhood with marriage, volunteering, family, and friends. It was exhausting.
My wise mother told me years ago, when I was in the thick of early mothering, “It’s going to feel exhausting because of their constant demands. But for the same reason they need you so much now, is the reason why they’ll call you first later.” And I remember thinking, but could they need me just a little less right now? Friends, if you’re in the thick of it, hang in there.
My children, one adult and one who’s quickly reaching that age, always call me first. To share excitement, worry, fear, elation, a first job, first heartache, first car accident, and first triumphs. It is the best gift and the hardest-earned accolade in my life.
Just this morning, as my son donned his newest, well-deserved buckle from rodeo winning, he came and found me. “Mom look!” It was the same voice I heard at 2, “Mom, watch me jump in the pool,” for the hundredth time. And the voice I heard at 5, “Mom, can I sit with you in the bathroom and read?” And the same voice at 10, “Can we go to the skate park,” Again??? And at 15, “Can we drive some more?” And this morning. And when I looked at his face, full of smiles and accomplishment, I said, “That’s amazing! You’re amazing! I LOVE watching you!” And he still glows with the love of being delighted in.
So, if you’re tired and barely making it as a mom (or dad!), just know that all the time is worth it. It’s not easy. It’s thankless. And it’s so very busy. But it will pass. And they’ll call you for all the big stuff.
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